Nana / ナナ (2005)

Nana is a live action movie adaption from the famous manga with the same title by Ai Yazawa. If you are familiar with Ai Yazawa's works before, then you're used to see such delicate characters with amazing fashion senses. Yes, Ai Yazawa herself took up fashion design major for a while before she dropped out and pursued career as a mangaka. Nana is no doubt one of her most successful mangas. The story goes by two female protagonist who shared the same name and yet they are the complete opposite. "Chipper Nana" is the happy-go-lucky bubbly girl who by chance encountered "gloomy Nana" on the train that's going to Tokyo. After they spent the night together on the way, they separaed ways until both of them ended up looking at the same apartment. 'White' Nana is a naive young woman who went to Tokyo to chase after Shoji, his boyfriend from her hometown, while 'Black' Nana is going to Tokyo to pursue her dream to become a singer. She's the vocalist of a punk-rock band Black Stones along with a couple other guys. From then, it follows both of their journeys as they tried to make their big city dreams come true.

Even if you have read the manga or watched the anime you're still in for a treat. Basically, this movie is perfect if you love slice-of-life, lighthearted type of movie with awesome J-rock music. Since Mika Nakashima (dark/black Nana) is a real life singer, you can only expect her to have great voice, but her acting definitely didn't disappoint either. The iconic Glamorous Sky song that she sung live with her band in the movie was probably my favorite part. Aoi Miyazaki (lovely/white Nana) was perfect for the role as well, kinda bummed that they recast her for the second movie. Black Nana and the boys of Black Stones have such consistent looks which I really dig. Since Ai Yazawa herself is a big fan of Vivienne Westwood, she did incorporate the designer's aesthetic within her characters.

This movie has a special place in my heart, because my very good friend actually introduced it to me about 9 years ago when we were still in junior high. I still feel the same no matter how many times I 've rewatched it.

on how to take life a little lightly

You might still remember my past blog post of me talking about how much I need to figure things out, and here's an update: I still haven't got any clue and I think it's okay.

I'm in my early twenties and like any other people my age,  I spend a lot of time on the internet reading tons of life advice because I'm very insecure about my life. From countless of articles I stumbled upon the internet, vast majority of them said that this is the time for me to do whatever the hell I want. As long as I'm unmarried, no dependents and have a little bit of savings, then I can travel the whole world if I want to and make love with strangers I just met on the streets. I really like that idea of being independent and adventurous a lot, but as much as I'm trying to plant that thoughts at the back of my head, that's just not who I am.

A friend once said to me, "People try so hard to get out of their comfort zone, but the truth is there's nothing wrong with being comfortable because you live for yourself" and it stays with me. Contrary to popular belief, it is actually okay to stay in your safe bubble as long as you want. There will come times when you're finally ready to burst out of the bubble to try something new, and granted you will be okay then. We have our own pace, and if you're a little behind than everyone around you don't beat yourself up.

People might not notice this about me when they see how outgoing and crazy I am around people, but my self-esteem is not the greatest and I have issues about being confident of what I'm capable of. I can't take compliments well and always give myself a hard time whenever people do say nice things about me. It frustrates me how I can't just accept praises with a gratitude, but I'm learning to slowly peel off this layer of personality that I don't like about myself because it stops me from having my moment. I am worthy of flattery, and you are too. Focus to cultivate positivity in your space of living. You only have one life, might as well enjoy the heck out of it. 

I'm not sure what I want to achieve from making this post because it feels like I'm writing advice for myself while also addressing the issue that I'm battling with so it's kind of contradicting in a way. Hear me out, life is very simple. The formula to live the life you want is to find a way, not an excuse.